Bee Wise
I know that's an odd thing to say, but it's true. And I'm not saying it because I'm so disaffected with my life that getting stung represents a high point compared to the daily grind. I'm genuinely thankful for being stung because it allowed me to face a fear I've had since I was about 10 years old, and showed me how much a meditation practice can pay off over time.
To briefly set the stage: I'm allergic to just about everything, and also have a penchant for anxious catastrophizing. As such, ever since I first heard that getting stung by a bee can cause anaphylaxis when I was a kid, I've been incredibly scared of being stung. When I was younger I would run away and/or in circles whenever a bee came near to me, and although now I stay calmer on the outside (don't want to model *that* for my kids...), I definitely still feel the anxiety on the inside.
Because that's the thing about anxiety: it lives on avoidance. In the absence of any real-life data your imagination runs wild, and can craft any number of nightmare scenarios. I started being afraid of bees because my anxiety convinced me that they legitimately posed a threat to my life. I stayed anxious for decades afterwards because I never had an opportunity to test that belief.
But yesterday I did. A bee flew, of all places, under my watch and stung my wrist.
It definitely hurt - that was the first thing I noticed. The second thing I noticed, though, was not what I expected. Instead of feeling panicky and anxious, I just thought something akin to: "Hey, now I get a chance to see how my body and mind react. This should be interesting, and I'll pop out the other side either not being afraid of bees or learning how much Epi-pens cost at the pharmacy."
I have to be honest - I'm incredibly, incredibly proud of myself for this. This line of thought wouldn't have happened as of a few years ago, and represents a *bunch* of work I've done on myself to be more mindful, curious, and accepting of my thoughts and experiences (even anxious ones).
And here I am now, on the other side, and no longer afraid of bees.
Getting stung was honestly an unexpected gift, because it forced me to face a fear I'd carried around for years.
If you've made it this far in my story, 1) thanks for sticking with it, and 2) my hope for you is that you find your own opportunity to get stung by the bee still buzzing around in your life.
Or even better: don't wait for the bee to find you, head out into the flowers and go find the bee yourself. Facing fears is always tough, but every time you do it you remind yourself that the only person putting limits on your emotional world is yourself.
Those things out there that you "can't" do because you're so anxious about them you don't even try? Believe it or not, you absolutely *can* do them. And once you do, you'll feel like a million bucks.